GOAL: PERSPECTIVE
Mindset Hack That Will Change Your Life: Living In The Present
Your personal power is absolute in any given moment. -The Stoics(-ish)
"Live in the present" is a popular inspirational line.
And I get what it's saying, but living in the present is meaningless without the context of past and future.
Your past gives your present meaning.
It tells you where you come from, informs the habits that make you behave the way you do today. Your past is why you react well or badly to bad news. It tells you why you're irritable: Did I get enough sleep last night? Have I been working unhappily in my job for 10 years now? Did my mom constantly criticize me when I was a child?
The future also gives your present meaning.
The future hasn't been made yet, and you have control over that. The actions you do at this moment shape the future. Am I going to quit my accounting job to pursue an art career? Should I apply to this expensive college? Should I send that cute girl a text?
"Live in the present" doesn't mean to forget your past and disregard the future.
It just means, understand that neither the past nor the future have any real control over the present.
The only thing that actually controls your present is you.
There is no hard, material connection between the past, the present, and the future.
Like, I can't hack away the awful past with some sci-fi Galaxy Sword, and I can't stick an awesome future onto the present with some fantasy Infinity Glue.
Yet, we live like the past dictates our present: that bad experience with a lover; the career path we took; the humiliation we felt that one time in class.
Likewise, we live like the future is a concrete, solid object that we can secure if we could only make the right decisions now: if I go to a prestigious college, I'll be set for life; if I never tell them how hurt I was, they will never leave me; if I am a good boy or girl, I will finally be accepted by my family.
Neither the past nor the future actually exist.
Therefore, living in the present means you can change anytime. You can decide anything anytime.
Yes, life is a free-for-all.
You can wake up one morning and go, “...I think I'm done missing my ex. I think I'll find someone who's actually emotionally available.”
You can be lying in bed ready to sleep and go, “...I guess it doesn't matter if they choose me for the job. If it's for me, it's for me. And if it's not, then I'm sure I'll find what's right for me eventually.”
Living in the present means acknowledging how the past and future contextualize your current state at this moment, but it also means recognizing that neither the past nor the future can dictate your choices. Only you can make those choices.
“I'm not going to let my parents' judgement of me decide how I live.”
“I'm going to get over my past, no matter how traumatic it has been.”
“I'm going to be a brave person starting right now.”
And that's powerful. 🦋
Exercise
SELF-DISCOVERY
- How does your past influence your life now?
- How does your future influence your life now?
- Do you think your choices would be braver, truer, or more interesting, if you lived in the present?